New Blood - Prologue
I knew I was going to forget something. All the talk of new blood and the buildup to it was as I wrote before. With one slight difference.
I forgot Peter!
After all the talk of new blood, Peter joined the group first. Before Brad did. The reason I remembered this is that in the previous post I talked about how I resented being left out of the interview for Brad, even though I understood the rationale.
It wasn't so much Mike saying I would not participate or being left out of the interview I resented. I resented that Peter was going to the interview. He had been a member of a month or two only. For me not to go to the interview while he went knocked my status way down in everyone's eyes.
Peter was a lawyer. I can't really say how he joined. I think he might have been a walkup. We practiced on an open piece of concrete in the park. People walked by for the entire 2 or 3 hours we were there. I think I do recall Peter stopping to watch, then speaking to Mike.
That is interesting when I think about it. All the big deals about interviews etc. Then to think about Mike talking to some passers by and that person eventually joining the group. Now, I think it was probably because Peter was a lawyer. Mike wanted people who were professionals or rich to be part of his clique. Mike had a real power trip going on. A set plan he was following unrelentingly.
I talked about all the money he made from the group and his psychology practice. He lived in an area where all the rich people live. If you have been around, you know that if you want money, you need to be around money. After awhile the rich people will accept you and you gain contact to the world of the rich. That is what Mike's plan was.
As I said, there were a few doctors in the class. I cannot say what the women were. Their isolation from the men was previously discussed. I can say that many of the students were all from the same rich area that Mike lived in. When I think about stuff like this, it is amusing. I really was the poor body, other side of the tracks student. I had enough money to pay Mike every month and that was about it. I was not a doctor, did not come from a rich family and I was not a college graduate. ;)
Anyways. I think Peter went in for a talk with Mike. Mike decided he liked him and suggested him as a group member. Of course that meant he was joining. The interview process was nothing but a formality.
I didn't really like Peter that much. He was a nice guy. He was friendly. I didn't like him because I did not respect him. He had no martial arts training at all and very little physical training of any kind. For Mike to have given me trouble about how I was not ready for his class, then accept Steve who had no martial arts training, then accept Peter, who had no martial arts training, really gave me a sour attitude towards Mike.
After being so ignorant of their first two attempts to get rid of me, by the time of Peter's joining the class, I was beginning to feel ignored or unwanted. Even being as dumb as I was. ;)
That gave me a bad attitude which was not the thing to do. It made me more quiet and more determined to not provide any excuse for them to say things to me. I also secretly resolved that nothing they would do would drive me away. I didn't care how rude it was. The only way I would ever leave was if they stood right in my face and asked me to go.
Peter was short with curly hair. He looked like a kid. Thinking about him right now I feel arrogant towards him. The arrogance is misplaced. I doubt if he was as bad as I thought and I doubt if I am as good as I think. Still, at the time, I felt like I could stomp on him.
He was another person like Steve who played the crowd or manipulated people. Same as Mike and Jeff really. Probably because he was a lawyer, he could read people. Within a class or two, Peter had picked up on the vibe in the group about me. I was a person with health problems. I had anxiety which made it difficult for me to be around with people. I was a person who did not really deserve respect.
Peter picked up on this and began taking the same attitude with me. I did not mind it from the others. I had resigned myself to accepting this when I joined the class. I judged the people in the class and decided I could live with them not respecting me.
For Peter, a guy who looked like a kid, with no martial arts experience at all, to come in as a new person and after 2 or 3 classes start treating me like that, it was too much. I didn't like Peter and I never really did like Peter.
I forgot Peter!
After all the talk of new blood, Peter joined the group first. Before Brad did. The reason I remembered this is that in the previous post I talked about how I resented being left out of the interview for Brad, even though I understood the rationale.
It wasn't so much Mike saying I would not participate or being left out of the interview I resented. I resented that Peter was going to the interview. He had been a member of a month or two only. For me not to go to the interview while he went knocked my status way down in everyone's eyes.
Peter was a lawyer. I can't really say how he joined. I think he might have been a walkup. We practiced on an open piece of concrete in the park. People walked by for the entire 2 or 3 hours we were there. I think I do recall Peter stopping to watch, then speaking to Mike.
That is interesting when I think about it. All the big deals about interviews etc. Then to think about Mike talking to some passers by and that person eventually joining the group. Now, I think it was probably because Peter was a lawyer. Mike wanted people who were professionals or rich to be part of his clique. Mike had a real power trip going on. A set plan he was following unrelentingly.
I talked about all the money he made from the group and his psychology practice. He lived in an area where all the rich people live. If you have been around, you know that if you want money, you need to be around money. After awhile the rich people will accept you and you gain contact to the world of the rich. That is what Mike's plan was.
As I said, there were a few doctors in the class. I cannot say what the women were. Their isolation from the men was previously discussed. I can say that many of the students were all from the same rich area that Mike lived in. When I think about stuff like this, it is amusing. I really was the poor body, other side of the tracks student. I had enough money to pay Mike every month and that was about it. I was not a doctor, did not come from a rich family and I was not a college graduate. ;)
Anyways. I think Peter went in for a talk with Mike. Mike decided he liked him and suggested him as a group member. Of course that meant he was joining. The interview process was nothing but a formality.
I didn't really like Peter that much. He was a nice guy. He was friendly. I didn't like him because I did not respect him. He had no martial arts training at all and very little physical training of any kind. For Mike to have given me trouble about how I was not ready for his class, then accept Steve who had no martial arts training, then accept Peter, who had no martial arts training, really gave me a sour attitude towards Mike.
After being so ignorant of their first two attempts to get rid of me, by the time of Peter's joining the class, I was beginning to feel ignored or unwanted. Even being as dumb as I was. ;)
That gave me a bad attitude which was not the thing to do. It made me more quiet and more determined to not provide any excuse for them to say things to me. I also secretly resolved that nothing they would do would drive me away. I didn't care how rude it was. The only way I would ever leave was if they stood right in my face and asked me to go.
Peter was short with curly hair. He looked like a kid. Thinking about him right now I feel arrogant towards him. The arrogance is misplaced. I doubt if he was as bad as I thought and I doubt if I am as good as I think. Still, at the time, I felt like I could stomp on him.
He was another person like Steve who played the crowd or manipulated people. Same as Mike and Jeff really. Probably because he was a lawyer, he could read people. Within a class or two, Peter had picked up on the vibe in the group about me. I was a person with health problems. I had anxiety which made it difficult for me to be around with people. I was a person who did not really deserve respect.
Peter picked up on this and began taking the same attitude with me. I did not mind it from the others. I had resigned myself to accepting this when I joined the class. I judged the people in the class and decided I could live with them not respecting me.
For Peter, a guy who looked like a kid, with no martial arts experience at all, to come in as a new person and after 2 or 3 classes start treating me like that, it was too much. I didn't like Peter and I never really did like Peter.
posted by Happeh at 6:29 AM
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